S8: E157 Summer Health Series: Parenting in the Middle Years (Elementary-Middle School)

 Afternoon Ti

Season 8

Episode 157

Summer Health Series: Parenting in the Middle Years (Elementary-Middle School)

We’re a few episodes into our summer health series.  In episode 156 I shared tips and ideas for raising your kids during the baby, toddler, and preschool years.  This episode will focus on the elementary and middle school years.  One of the healthiest things we can do in the summers as teachers who also have our own kids is to find ways to interact with our kids doing things that are meaningful to them and to us and make time for rest and play for ourselves and our kids.  

I organized these ideas by the age of the children because there are things we are able to do when kids are older that likely aren’t as easy when they’re younger.  Like I said in the last episode, these ideas aren’t meant to pressure you to do things a specific way - hopefully it’s encouraging if anything - and maybe you’ll find an idea or two to try that brings a moment of joy or a new favorite thing!  Disclaimer:  I’m not a pediatrician so these ideas are things that worked for our family and our girls.  Always be sure to follow the advice of your doctor for what is best for your child.

Elementary Years:

1. Breakfast in bed

2. Playdates - once a week or every other week (more if you’re up for it).  Trade days with a friend - they have the kids for a few hours one day and you have them for a few hours another day.  I often found that I can get things done around the house easier if my daughter has a friend over.  Can be helpful to think ahead of time what they might want to do if you often hear “We’re bored… what should we do?” during playdates.  Brainstorm with your child ideas that they could enjoy if you don’t want them playing video games the entire time.  

3. If your child enjoys games, try some of these fun ones that are off the beaten path.  Though I love a good game of the classics like Clue and Chutes and Ladders too.

Parcheesi - oldie but goodie 

Labryinth - made by Ravensburger 

Mastermind - 

WonderForge Suspicion - older elementary 

Ticket to Ride - older elementary 

Watch YouTube tutorials to play - super helpful!

4. Water activities are a huge one for us in Texas.  We go to the pool almost every day.  Swim team is M-F so the girls did that in elementary school each morning, but always wanted to go back and play.  There are several games that we play together in the pool:  Grades - explain

Add-on - explain

Water Volleyball (literally hitting a beach ball or soft ball in the air back and forth) 

Lap challenges (you swim freestyle, but I’m going to swim butterfly… you get a headstart for five seconds... ).

5. Library Story Times: We often went to the Frisco Library for storytimes and checked out books to read.  Kept track of the books read, redeemed our lists at Barnes and Noble for a free book at the end of the summer, and celebrated smaller milestones with I Heart Yogurt or donuts or gum or another book.

6. Girls spent time most days doing math workbooks, practicing piano, and reading.  I always told them that by giving an hour (or less) each day to keeping their brains active meant that they weren’t stagnant and the rest of the day was theirs to do what they wanted.  Most times they did this after lunch.  Had a little chill time - similar to when they were younger - and then amped up into some kind of activity.

7. Do things that are available in your area.  We lived half a mile from a water park called Hawaiian Falls.  For two seasons we got family passes and the girls and I made a day of it.  We walked or rode bikes or scooters or I pushed Julia in the stroller because it allowed us to make an adventure out of getting there and we were completely dry by the time we got home.  There was an Aquatic center in the other direction from our house where swim lessons were offered so we did the same thing - walked/rode there and then the girls had their lessons.  We had a park nearby with some walking trails.  When we moved to Dallas there was a nice park about 10-15 minutes from our house that had nice trails, water, and fun places to picnic.  Julia and I made a picnic lunch and put it in a backpack with a towel.  Brought our dog Val in the car.  Took him for a walk in the park and then chose a shaded spot to enjoy a nice lunch.  Somedays we make lunch at home and go out into the backyard to eat it.  A change of scenery is fun even if you’re eating the same meal you might have had at your kitchen table.  

8. Movie “Yes Day” - something we’ve done is to have the girls make a list of things they’d like to do.  I’m often amazed at how simplistic their ideas are.  Things we often do anyways, but doing them all in one day somehow makes it just that much better.  Narrow the list to a specific number and things that you would allow.  Then ask them to rank them in order beginning with the ones they want to do the most!  Enjoy each idea and go through them… often don’t get to all of them in one day so we’ll start where we left off another day - do one or more - and continue until we’ve completed them all (or most of them) during the summer.

Middle School Years:

1. Go to their events even if they tell you not to.  Be up front with them if you can’t make it to something and do what you say you’ll do.

2. Encourage them.  Leave notes on their desks at home.  Or by their bedside table.  Not in their lunches or where friends might see them.  But in places where they can see them and then throw them out or keep them.  

3. Text them.  This has often been the best way for Riley and I to communicate if we’re frustrated at each other.  We both are able to better articulate what we want to say in writing than through talking.  Plus we can add in funny gifs or memes throughout and it always brings about laughter.  Then we hug in person and it’s all better.

4. One on one time together.  Doing anything.  Eating Chik Fila.  Going to the mall to buy new shoes.  Eating out.  Something without their siblings.

5. Expect push back.  Expect emotional ups and downs.  Expect them to see themselves as the only ones who are struggling while looking at their friends and thinking that they have it all together and don’t have a hard time with anything.  Expect them to not share how amazing their time was with you.  When they do say it was a good day, they had fun, or thank you - soak it in.  

High School Years:  

1. I don’t know anything about this stage yet.